We Lived This Way For Years

time slipped from our grasp
and like a moony girl we clung
harder to our holy texts
filtering out life’s variegated
strings, jaws of spit
tautening in the crevices
a mouth wishing only for a better
pair of breasts.

candles melted at windowsills
the heart rolled
in the earth’s slip —

judgement, self-flagellation, 
pity — these things returned 
to the core of a person
where once a body
ambulated without
the condition of a gaze
though we accustomed
with eerie quickness
to each other’s evaluation

you cannot decide
where
lightning will strike; and the trust 
between us
dissolved; animals died
horrifically 
unremarked upon; hearts
were felled by disrepute
and lies; soles socked
in lead; everyone of us intubated
as a psychotic
desire to reinvent one’s self continued
to abound; it was like the time
I had to get drunk
to tell you how I felt, genuflecting
before the knot of ice
blood beading my cuticles, and 
what I wanted to say was
I’d like to imagine this world
in another way

— MARGARET SAIGH

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